May 31, 2011

The Manual Buzzer 2011 Finals Preview Presented by a rerun of Comedy Central's Roast of David Hasselhoff

It is finally time to see the conflict play out: Will Dirk's magic be enough to overcome The Big 3. Sorry, Carlos Boozer, but I must go back on what I previously tweeted. Chris Bosh OWNED you that series. Maybe better strategic placement of your bag, which was probably from a huge Macy's sale, will help you get better momentum going into the playoffs.

But now we are left with a rematch of the 2006 Finals with the Heat coming out of the East and the Mavs coming out of the West, relatively easily, over inexperienced teams in five game series. Both the Bulls and Thunder will take inventory into their assets and what they will do this offseason to recover from massive disappointments, but it mostly comes down to what both Finals participants have going for them: multiple weapons that have been there before.

Both teams will try to protect their primary scorers on the defensive end. Dirk is probably going to end up having to prevent Joel Anthony gathering garbage points like Charlie Kelly or setting picks that get him switched onto Wade or Lebron, which in the best interest of the Mavericks, will require Dirk to play some matador defense and let the effective help system take over.

Dirk presents a similar quandary to the Heat, but the emergence of Udonis Haslem in Game 2 makes it a much easier puzzle for Spoelestra. If Haslem had been playing the whole regular season, or more than 13 games, no one would be dwelling on the Heat's losing streaks and struggle against the League's elite. But now he provides exactly what Miami needs opposite Bosh. While he struggled in Games 4 and 5, and only saw garbage time in Game 1, Haslem showed himself ready to defend whatever scoring big man would be thrown at him. However, I just doubt that Haslem, at 6'8", has the discipline and athleticism to guard Dirk mano e mano. He will probably effectively provide fouls, but that is about it. Therefore, it falls to Bosh, and possibly Juwan Howard providing fouls off the bench, to make Dirk earn it from the line, which is a foolish proposition following his inhuman 59-61 performance from the stripe against the Thunder. Even if the great David Hasselhoff is invoked again.

A lot is being made of Scottie Pippen's foolish comments about Lebron being better than Jordan, but I think one scenario will be the icing on the cake: if Lebron has to guard Dirk late in the game like he did with Derrick Rose in the Conference Finals and manages to shut him down. I hate to say it, but for how good of a defender Jordan was, he did it mostly on help defense. His most famous defensive play in what I consider his true final game, Game 6 of the 1998 Finals (The Wizards never happened, OKAY?!), came when he helped off of Jeff Hornacek. It was Scottie's job to guard the best offensive backcourt player on the other team, which is probably why he felt spiteful enough to say what he did about Jordan. And when he did get stuck on the other team's best offensive player? Check this video out:

I know this is only one play and near the end of MJ's career, but even then, you have to play smarter and not be made a fool by a young bull like that.

Back to the Finals with the prediction: I think Kevin McHale is right; the Mavs have turned a corner defensively with Tyson Chandler and Brendan Haywood providing the best 1-2 punch at the position in the League. The defensive matchups will be difficult for the Mavs, but as Jason Kidd showed in the Conference Semifinals, he can guard the best because of the support system he has behind him. It will be especially helpful to have DeShawn Stevenson, a man who appreciates Abraham Lincoln's presidency quite a bit, to help out with the defensive burden. Whoever the Heat throw at Dirk will not have the patience to guard him, so I expect him to see the line a lot. Unless the Heat double him, in which case Dirk is smart enough to dish it out to the other three 3-point shooters available to him.

But again, Lebron is Lebron, and Wade is Wade, and for how terrible people think Bosh is, I don't think there is a better third-best player in the League right now. Miami will give them fits with a spread floor with Mike Miller and Mike Bibby, or as I like to call them, "Weird-Lookin' Mikes," spotted up from three. In desperation, James Jones might be added to the rotation, but Haslem's ability to defend, and Jones' complete lack of it, probably means he gets no time.

I have to go with the team that is on fire and has more weapons it can utilize. I just feel like Lebron and Wade will start isolating, which will make them much less effective and lead to the Heat's downfall. Mavs in 7.

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